Monday, 23 April 2012

RIP dear washing machine, you were loved

If you’re a regular here, you’ll know all about the Lionheart’s bubble-love romance with the washing machine. “You spin me right round, baby, right round!” It’s one of the Trav’s quirky autistic traits – an obsession with spinning. He loves the repetition. Round and around and around…

Aah, washing machine, last week you spun your last spin cycle. Your steady whump-whump-whump no longer thrums through our kitchen. Not even Soapy the Labrador was as faithful a playmate to our Travis as your nine-minute spin dry cycle.

Remember the year I watched too many episodes of Cake Boss, and plastered together a hastily-made sponge cake with plastic icing and food colouring? I wanted to celebrate my eccentric kiddo’s third birthday with a washing machine-shaped cake, with floaty soap suds and buttons made out of Smarties. What I ended up with was a lopsided rectangle with crusty cream cheese icing (because take #1 of this masterpiece was supposed to be a carrot cake). One friend innocently enquired: “Uh, is that shaped like a toilet?”

Over the years, readers have asked: “Gee! How much washing DO you do in your home?” The truth is: just the usual. The whole time Travis had the washing machine spinning, he was pressing the spin dry button again and again and again. The drum was empty most of the time. Those ball bearings were bound to give in sooner or later.

Bit of a parenting fail in the over-indulgent department there.

It was a heavy heart and a lighter wallet that I purchased a Samsung 13kg top-loader today for the family. My hubby and I spent my first afternoon off cruising through Makro, Metro, the Samsung experience store, Game, Hi-Fi Corporation and finally back to Makro – where we finally picked out a washing machine we think offers the best value for money for our tribe of dirty laundry-makers.

Unfortunately, being a top-loader, Travis no longer has a porthole to watch his ‘soapies’. Which is not the end of the world, I suppose. But sometimes you have to be practical.

So this is the end, my spinning friend.

In the Lionheart household, our washing machine was more than an appliance. For Travis it was a novelty, a babysitter, a familiar face, a comforting hug…

Now its final resting place will most likely be in the courtyard outside our kitchen door – where I intend to let my sons vandalise it with Koki pens and stick-ons. And it wouldn’t hurt their future marriages if our now-defunct washing machine inspired the occasional game of make-believe ‘let’s do the laundry’!


  1. I have got the Samsumg 13 kg top loader...I love it because I can actually fit a duvet in. Sorry that little Travis lost him porthole...

  2. Oh dear. I have the same Samsung. That thing is the BUSINESS! I have to confess - I have the same habit as Travis - I can watch the laundry for AGES. It's very soothing, for some reason. Anyway, what I did was put a high chair/barstool next to the machine and I can still see in. WAH. Cannot believe I confessed this online!

  3. It took me almost 5 years of regular checking in for discounts to see if the LG Steamwash was offered on discount - to no avail. Eventaully I prayed it into my house given that it costs three times as much as a regular washing machine. But who knows, maybe one day when I find a wife and have kids the allergy cycle will come in handy... When my Defy Auto Maid went onto Manual Maid mode and refused to wash anything more than two shirts at a time and complaining about that load too, I knew the time had come. I could put off no longer! Now look, no man should ever be this happy with something that does not come with mags or a sound system, but the words cat and cream springs to mind. On the day of arrival I took a day off and did... yep! Laundry! I kept watching that spinning porthole as if something magical would happen and when walking away I kept on thinking it stopped working - only to realize that modern washing machines are quiet and need not be caught marching out the front door during spinning cycles. My whites really are whiter... Oh man, I can never confess to appliance talk in public! Aj


Thanks for sharing, Lionheart readers. ROAR!