Monday, 11 June 2012

In the starting blocks: Sleek Geek

I’m not shy about sharing this number: 69.8kg (I mean, it’s not as big as THIS number). But then I viewed the ‘before’ photos that the Husband took for my eight-week Sleek Geek Winter Warrior challenge this morning! Holy Mojitos! And hot wings. And every packet of delicious smoked beef-flavoured crisps I’ve ever devoured in one sitting…
The horror.

And just to be thorough, the Husband was sure to also take a photo of me bending over while adjusting the newspaper showing today’s date.

On Saturday morning I had to report to Old Ed’s Virgin Active in Houghton to have my measurements taken. I really did look like a ‘winter warrior’, armed with an egg-lifter to scrap the ice off the race car ya-ya’s windscreen at a chilly 6.20am, wearing my Eye of the Tiger style beanie. Did I mention that Saturday was the coldest, most noombie-chilling recorded day in Jozi’s winter season so far?

I’m dropping the post-baby pounds for a good cause: #iPadsforLionhearts. There’s a pot of R45 000 to be split between four winners (the pool is 90 contestants). Even if I don’t win the prize money, I’m still saying goodbye to about 10kgs of adipose tissue.

When I picture my fat rolls, it helps me to think back on that ghastly yellowish tissue that you can see on the video and photos when the doctors sliced into my belly for both my caesareans. There I was… spread out on a delivery room table, and instead of being overwhelmed with joy as both my sons were yanked into the world, I’m cringing at the visceral sight of my fat – the actual goopy, jelly-ish fat like you’d trim off your stewing meat – exposed for all the world to see!

I’ve never been able to flaunt my body in a bikini, but with age has come a certain level of comfort. I’ved become okay with my shape… Now I realise I’ve confused being comfortable with being complacent.

It’s not so much fatness as FITNESS that concerns me. With Travis not being able to walk, I cannot let myself slide! For goodness sake; I’m grunting with the effort it takes to life him out of the bath tub! I’m wheezing if I have to carry more than a few steps. The effort to cart him from his classroom to my car parked outside of his nursery school was tremendous.

This morning’s teeny weeny black-and-white polka dot bikini ‘before’ photos for the Sleek Geek challenge show a mommy with zero muscle tone! So I’m replacing a few kilos with muscle over the next eight weeks – and if I do really well and win, I might raise some much-needed funds for #iPadsforLionhearts and buy three second-hand iPads for children with autism who can’t afford one of these pricey gadgets.

Don’t forget, if you have an old iPad at home you could donate it, too. We’ve already re-homed one iPad with little Emma Hunt, who has Aspergers. A second iPad is making it’s way to us to find a new home for it. My goal for the year is 10 #iPadsforLionhearts. That’s the course of 10 young people with autism’s lives radically changed for the better.

The wonderful, witty, generous, AMAZING (really, I could go on and on with the flattering adjectives here) Tamarai is doing the Sleek Geek challenge too. She’s raising funds for #iPadsforLionheats and the SPCA. Please do support this generous soul, by sponsoring her for every kilo she loses. You can email Tam on, and she’ll pop you a sponsor sheet!

Here are my before measurements:

Height: 166cm
Weight: 69.8kg
Chest: 55cm
Bicep: 27cm (flexed – pathetic hey?)
Tummy: 96cm
Thigh: 53cm
Hips: 104cm GASP!
Body fat (with calipre): 27%

I may do a little fundraising of my own... with the big reveal of my horrendous ‘before’ photo as the prize. Public humiliation: back in the good old days I’d do it for free Tequila shots – but 31-year-old me will do it for charity. What do you think? Could you spare some change for #iPadsforLionhearts in return for having a giggle at my expense?


  1. Yay! Thanks for the compliments. Now I have a lot to live up to! Let's get cracking at raising those funds, shall we?

  2. This is such a gorgeous post. Love your honesty. I'm also taking part in the Winter Warrior. Good luck !

  3. You go Stace and you make those fat cells scream and cry the whole way to new iPads for our Lionheart friends!

  4. Good luck...I will be routing for you from the sideline


Thanks for sharing, Lionheart readers. ROAR!